The Policeman's Blog

bam chicka wah wah.... first post...
 

This post has been removed by the author.
 

Doesn't it seem that more and more people are depressed lately? Or should I put 'depressed' in inverted commas?

OK, all of us get out of the wrong side of bed every now and again, and feel a bit down, but at what point does that require a trip ot the doctor?

The amount of people who tell me they are 'depressed'!

It seems Prozac is as common as Paracetamol these days; suddenly everyone's 'depressed.'
 

Some basic data:

Women in cohabiting relationships are, or were, nearly 5 times more likely to suffer domestic violence from their 'partners' than married women.

From The Family: is it just another lifestyle choice?, edited by Jon Davies, IEA Health and Welfare Unit publication, 1993, p 52.

Children with 2 natural parents cohabiting are 18 times more likely to be fatally abused than those of 2 natural parents married. That figure rises to 74 times with a natural mother and cohabitee.

The figure is 3 times, even for a natural mother alone.

From Broken Homes and Battered Children, by Robert Whelan, Family and Education Trust, 1994, p 30-32.

Mr Whelan reports that in the early 1990s, 2 natural parents married accounted for 72% of all households, 2 natural parents cohabiting was 2%, a natural mother with a cohabitee only 0.11% but a natural mother alone 19%.

This is important for what follows.

Stephen Green, The Sexual Dead, Broadview, 1992, p 239 reported that 77% of serious child abuse (against children aged about 4) occurred in 16% of households, at the time 'alternative' households, as distinct from 2 natural parents married.

None of this has influenced public policy w.r.t. marriage and the family - it is of no interest to mainstream politicians - but I suspect it must have an impact on the work of the police.
 

why not just ask it anyway?
 

Some people are just not meant to be together, which is a shame when the world only realises after the event. Most of the serious domestic violence offences just need the wife or girlfriend to move away and not leave a forwarding address (and I say wife/girlfriend as the vast majority of offenders are men). Once they have hit their partner the average 35 times before partner speaks to us, the behaviour is too heavily ingrained to ever really change for long, whether they get to court or not.
Please just remember that no matter how irritating it is when a DV victim drops things or is unsure, your irritation is nothing compared with how shit their life is. I speak as someone whose best friend had several years of DV abuse from a previous partner, and genuinely struggled to get away. It turned a bright bubbly young woman into a wreck who is still scared to go out on her own, 10 years on and 150 miles away from the ex.
 

I think the point DC is trying to make is that the introduction of the form is not for the benefit of the individual but for the organisation . THE only thing that matters is caring enough to provide a sustained service in the face of the inevitable round of retractions and recidivist behaviour . The mattter of a filed form never saved anyone.
AREASEARCHNEGATIVE .
 

Blue pimpernel - I would gladly arrest and mix a bottle for any male bully in a domestic environment. However, after years of attending domestics I have to say women are often just as bad and equally to blame.
The usual is a domestic, over a trivial incident, where the women is at that time of the month. In the old days I sorted matters out for the night and recontacted her a few days later where she would 9 times out of 10 apologise - state they were back together and there were no problems. She didnt want any action on that assault because she remembered she punched him first.
Now I am expected to statement an emotionally charged women who hates her partner/husband with a passion - so much so she is capable of defying all logic and manipulate the truth to such an extent that he is in big trouble.
The male is locked up and charged on the basis of this emotionally charged statement. Sure he may have pushed her - more often than not to stop him being punched or kicked again.
Two or three days later she retracts - aware that she was as much to blame, if not more. But it is too late - you can't retract - we have a "positive action" policy etc etc.
Would I be criticised for taking a statement off someone who is drunk?? Yes
Would I be criticised for taking a statement off someone who is drugged up?? Yes
Would I be criticised for taking a statement off someone too emotionally immature to give on.. Yes
But I have to take one off a woman in the throws of a huge body change and who for two days is illogical and irrational??

Domestic risk assessments should include information on the menstrual cycle of the woman involved.
Domestic abuse is that bloke having to sleep in his car - dossing down at his mates once a month - and those blokes who would rather be at work than being nagged at home
 

Hormones can and do make women super-sensitive at "that" time of the month, and during menopause. What can easily create a few fireworks is male arrogance and insensitivity towards the woman. The usual dismissive remark of "that time of the month dear" is not helpful.
It should also be taken on board that men are also subject to hormone fluctuations, which make them just as "grumpy" and unreasonable. So lets be even handed here. Women are more likely to "retract" because they are more forgiving. Men tend to nurse their injured pride more than women.
 

How often do we see couples, young and old, standing in the street, screaming at each other like fish wives (what on Earth does that actually mean?!). They clearly feel it's appropriate behaviour.

Have people's expectations lowered when it comes to being in a relationship? Do they believe that this level of attention is all they deserve?

Obviously, every situation needs to be assessed on an individual basis, but I don't doubt that many domestic violence incidents are a case of "six of one, half a dozen of the other". Speaking as a woman who suffers with a hormone monster once a month, it gets scarey when you've flipped out and lobbed a crash helmet at a wall and male friends are scattering in fear. I hated myself so much, I now self medicate with herbal remedies to keep it in check, and it's worked a treat! I can imagine how some women turn into psycho freaks once a month, but that's no excuse for physical assault. Even at my worst, I never hit anyone, only inanimate objects, and the only person who got hurt was me (usually bruised knuckles from punching brick walls).

I know we can all say horrible things whilst arguing with a loved one, but I can't imagine physically assaulting a partner or family member.

Many victims of domestic violence have been reduced to almost nothing through mental torture. Systematically being destroyed so that they're living in fear and don't have the strength to escape their situation. It's those victims that I feel most sorry for. Those scars take a long time to heal, if they ever have the opportunity.

I must admit, regarding depression, I have been diagnosed with clinical depression, partly due to my balance and hearing disorders, and partly due to where I live. I hate telling people when they ask about my medical condition as the word is bandied about so freely these days, and I hate people just shrugging it off as me having a "bad day". People using the word "depression" so freely has devalued it for people who have been diagnosed, and therefore many of us find it hard to even admit that we're sufferers. Not everyone suffering with clinical depression is a nutter! (insert cheesey grin here)

The form DC refers to may well help with mopping up after an incident, but all I can see is yet another form forced upon our Coppers by the Government. It sounds extremely time consuming and I'm struggling to see how it helps the victim at the time. Surely most Coppers would prefer to deal with the incident before them in a proactive fashion, bringing charges where necessary, advising on courses of action where possible, and providing the victim with contact details for agencies to assist them in moving forward.

Wouldn't Officers prefer that approach and being able to get on with Policing instead of behaving (if you'll excuse the blanket description) like Social Workers?

It's about time our Coppers were allowed to get back to Policing instead of being expected to provide a multitude of services which would be better supplied by individuals with indepth knowledge of each specific agency......my opinion, of course.
 

Djelibeybi. Well I bet those guys now know not to push it too far with you, don't they? No bad thing girl! You should not "hate yourself" for not taking any crap when feeling a little sensitive. Crap that you would probably put up with, patiently, the rest of the month.
Men, it has to be said, the macho types, have been stuck in a groove of patronising women for far too long. When women kick off because they have had enough, men tend to dismiss the incident as "time of the month", or "she's a nutter", a loony, a "fruitbat". They get away with this because the male dominated medical and legal professions actually regard someone who suffers from depression as a "mental case", and therefore a 3rd class citizen whose words have no value or credibility. Time THAT was changed!
 

Anon 9.14 pm, the key word in my first post was 'serious'. Maybe I should have been a bit clearer, I also know of plenty of domestics where the woman is also to blame, but as PMS is a medical issue, can you really attach blame to someone suffering from that any more that you have bad feelings towards a paranoid schizophrenic?

A schizophrenic stabbed a colleague of mine to death 3 years ago, I hate what he did but I have the awareness of his condition not to hate him.

I wasn't discussing drunken violent arguments between two idiots who happen to share the same house and bed, purely the relationships where one party is sober and terrified. I can tell the difference between an angry IP and a terrified one.

For the previous category of drunken lunatics, they need to be split up for both their sakes and for the sake of protecting them from each other, but if it's equal, then they both have the freedom to leave. If someone stays in that sort of relationship when they have equal freedom to leave, then fair enough, they bring some of it on themselves. But I'm talking about the cases where people try to get away but simply have nowhere to go, so badly that they eventually try suicide. If someone has moved a long distance to be with a partner, as my friend did, only for it to go badly wrong and have unsupportive parents saying 'made your bed, lie on it' or words to that effect, or some other reason to be almost totally dependant on the (violent) partner, then they are often stuck with them for financial reasons as well.

There are hostels and all sorts of ways of getting out of the situation, but it's usually us they ring first, and they deserve our help and not our judgement. My friends dealings with the local police at the time were appalling, if the same situation were dealt with in my force the same way today, heads would roll, it was totally against the ethos of domestic violence today and their basic lack of interest made things a lot worse for her. Amongst other sins, they batted a section 18 wounding and a false imprisonment, both with independant witnesses available, which led her to the point where she didn't report a rape as they just didn't bother with anything else. I would be ASHAMED to police like that.

Those backwards attitudes did her a load of harm, and I have to say, whatever other good you do for victims and I'm sure that you do, I hear echoes of that attitude in your post, as they used the same excuses to bat.

(this isn't a grudge over mishandling of one case known to me personally btw, I see both types of domestics on a regular basis, it's just one example)
 

"Have people's expectations lowered when it comes to being in a relationship? Do they believe that this level of attention is all they deserve?"

It's what their parents did (or, more likely, their unmarried mother and boyfriend #23), and they have nothing much to do other than collecting the next dole cheque, and load up on alcohol and drugs. Creating problems in this way at least brings some interest into their lives.

As for 'most domestic violence committed by men', from what I've read on the subject that's far from the case. There's also a major difference in that any woman who is being abused can go to a shelter, whereas men are not given that choice; therefore men who might otherwise just leave for the night end up backed into a corner by an abusive woman ends up fighting back because they have no non-violent alternative.

Quite frankly, I don't know how anyone who's spent much time around people could imagine that women are significantly less abusive than men. If anything, many of the women I've known are far worse, they just prefer verbal abuse to physical because they're weaker.
 

I think that the point of the article was that whilst this is a serious problem from whichever way you view it, the filling out of a longwinded form in triplicate is not going to solve the issue.
The reason most Officers I know despise the DVU's is that they don't actually get involved with each individual case but are very quick to criticise any perceived failure on the part of the Officer attending the incident.
Think about it 22 year old Officer attends incident between people old enough in some cases to be his/her parents and is expected to deal with their problems. No training given to deal with this type of incident so is it any wonder that the Forces have fallen back on the method of "easiest way out" arrest the suspect offender --and it had better be the man-- appease the pressure groups and whichever Politician is howling the loudest.
Regardless of the real consequences of this action.

Time I think for some judgmental attitude taking toward these people. Let them know what is really though about them instead of Kow Towing to the latest psycobabble about lifestyle choices and how it is everybody's right to do as they like. I would welcome a little more moral leadership based on the social values of my grandparents before it is too late. You may think that I am a "dinosaur" but I have seen the changes in society over the last 50 years and I don't think that its behaviour towards itself is anything to be proud of.
I was very interested to read the post regarding the studies that show the strength of married natural parents as opposed to any alternative, assuming that this information is true then why has it not been publicised more widely? in both the written and broadcast media.

One can only wonder.

Jurgen
 

Don't split them up whatever you do. You could end up ruining two other perfectly good families
 

Alien Anthropologist. Women get "verbal" as a defence against insults directed by sniping men, who delight in winding up the woman. She eventually has enough and out comes a right gobful, argument takes place, with or without physical violence, man storms off, [often to the pub] blaming the woman to justify his devious plan to spend more time with his male mates, in the pub or whatever.
Unless of course he really wants to be released from the responsibility in a relationship because he has a roving eye, and then of course it's a justification of, "my wife/partner doesn't understand me". Sometimes this devious behaviour is done to scapegoat an innocent victim. The games people play.
It is also a complete myth and government spin, that people living on welfare benefits can actually afford a "lifestyle" of expensive alcohol and drugs on a daily basis.
Welfare benefits provide just enough to pay for food, fuel and essential daily requirements. Not a life of indulgence. The press have been responsible for a great deal of hype about people on Incapacity benefit living a life of luxury. That is complete bollocks and it is NOT that easy to claim it from a rather oppressive system, which grants it ONLY to those who are genuinely sick.
Dole etc is a safety net for those who, for whatever reason are not in paid employment. People moan, complain and resent those less fortunate than themselves receiving benefits. Without that safety net system there WOULD be more crime, which desperate people would commit just to survive. The sick would also die without dignity.
There but for the grace of God go I.
 

Jurgen. The studies about married parents probably has not been publicised more because, that would stir up all the old stigma and discrimination against single parents. They were the government's "whipping boy" for long enough. The new "whipping boy" are the sick, and those suffering from depression on Incapacity bebefit.
 

It's usually the man who needs locking up because:

Men are usually the introducer of violence into the situation, regardless of who is at fault for the argument.

Statistically, most domestic murders are committed by men, against women.

Verbal abuse does cause frustration and anger, but not fear to the same extent as physical. Verbal abuse does not keep someone trapped in the house the same way as physical abuse.

It's bugger all to do with pressure groups - a pressure group will not be sat in interview with you if your arrest grounds or evidence are a bit ropey, but the suspects solicitor will be, and they will quite rightly make an issue of the fact that our evidence or grounds are a bit on the thin side, if that is the case.

The law will always override force policy, however, so if a supervisor uses 'policy' to try and force you to arrest a male suspect (or anyone else, for that matter!) when the grounds are not there, the only course of action is to follow the law. Your supervisor might be annoyed, but there's always bullying to fall back on if they victimize you for it. Far better that than to carry out an unlawful arrest and get sued for it later, as you can bet the force will trot out the fact that you've been trained in the laws of arrest, and that any subsequent cock-up is your fault and not theirs.
 

"Men are usually the introducer of violence into the situation, regardless of who is at fault for the argument."

Tosh - though the violence may be more serious when introduced by men, and women are almost certainly far more likely to report domestic violence to the police:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/259913.stm



On another subject (though it's a recurring NuLabour theme) - I see that Brown's govt is banging on about extending detention so that there is no specific limit.

Incredible! In the US (the site of 9/11 after all) they operate with a ten day limit.

So, are the FBI superhuman, or are our terrorist police and security services totally and utterly incompetent? (After Iraq and the calamity re WMD, I think there is a fair case for saying MI6, at least, are incompetent).

I think our terrorist police should stop trying to turn our country into a police state, and start trying to do a competent job.
 

my force have a question on the form...wait for it.....
has you partner ever threatened to harm any pets?

i kid you not!
 

I refuse to believe that women can be just as bad as men at anything! Women are saints. They do no wrong at all. There is no such thing as female violence and female violence towards men DOES NOT EXIST! Now, people have said I have my head in the sand and others have said my head is somewhere much worse. However, I find it is easier to always blame the man. We need a scapegoat and men should be it. Any man who blames a female for anything is just insensitive and sexist. Women are incapable of both so it does not apply.

Do you know, that one person even asked me to view a film about violent females, media bias and government inaction! I was astounded. He sent me this link and told me to go and look for myself.

http://www.archive.org/details/Bull.Busters.Violent.Women

Well, naturally I refused. I knew, even before I went to look, it would be some made up, highly edited, sexist, rubbish designed to smear the "gentle sex." He even told me that more women than men initiate violence in the home. That more women than men commit child abuse and that there are female paedophiles as well as male kiddy fidellers. I MEAN, COME ON! I watch the BBC you know and if such things REALLY existed the BBC would tell us!

I was outraged!

I quite expected him to say that female offenders should go to jail for as long as men! How much of a phillistine would one have to be to believe that!

OUTRAGEOUS!

Everything is insensitive men's fault. We all know that!

I can tell you, I was deeply outraged!
 

The Blue Pimpernel said...

Some people are just not meant to be together, which is a shame when the world only realises after the event. Most of the serious domestic violence offences just need the wife or girlfriend to move away and not leave a forwarding address (and I say wife/girlfriend as the vast majority of offenders are men). Once they have hit their partner the average 35 times before partner speaks to us, the behaviour is too heavily ingrained to ever really change for long, whether they get to court or not.
Please just remember that no matter how irritating it is when a DV victim drops things or is unsure, your irritation is nothing compared with how shit their life is. I speak as someone whose best friend had several years of DV abuse from a previous partner, and genuinely struggled to get away. It turned a bright bubbly young woman into a wreck who is still scared to go out on her own, 10 years on and 150 miles away from the ex.

NOW, THERE IS A MAN WHO KNOWS! (Assuming he IS a man. It might be a woman. I don't want to appear sexist. I would rather cut off my penis than appear to offend any female.)

The Blue Pimple is correct! Everything is men's fault and I mean everything! We all ought to be thoroughly ashamed for even daring to breath the same air as women. Now, (and you will not believe this)someone told me that the domestic violence industry is run by feminists and they make up statistics and nasty sound bites in order to fix all the blame for abuse on men while at the same time, claiming that women never hurt anyone, at any time, ever. This.... (I hesitate to call it a person) thing, said that if the domestic violence industry really cared about victims they would care about ALL victims and that includes men. Well! I was OUTRAGED! It then went on to say that a study carried out by the Home Office called H.O.S 191 in 1996 showed that 3.3 million men and 3.3 million women suffer abuse each year. He then claimed that hundreds of studies from around the world and some as recent as last month have found the same evidence. WHAT UTTER NONSENSE! The papers would have told us if that were true and they have nothing about it. The government would have told us and the BBC and the police.

OUTRAGEOUS LIES!

Just like BluePurplenell above, I refuse to even countenance the idea that women can inflict damage on men or children.

This misguided man told me to remember cases like those women in Bristol that encouraged their children to beat each other up because their mother had done the same to them. Well! I said to him, I said, "She said she was only toughening them up and that is good enough for me! If a woman," I said, "tells me ANYTHING is true then it MUST be true!"

I agree totally with the Blurred Pimplebellend. Women are NEVER EVER WORNG! Why, they are beaten 35 times before they tell anyone. Even though we have bombarded them them with information, support, refuges and so on, they still keep quiet during 35 beatings. That PROVES how saintly they are! To dare to imply that is a lie made up by feminists that hate men and run the abuse industry is OUTRAGEOUS!

Do you Purple BlueMurder, what this man said to me? Are you ready for this? He said, if as many women were truly suffering abuse as Women's Aid claim, we would be tripping over them on every street in the country. OUTRAGEOUS but that is not all. He then said, "You." (He meant me! -- I was outraged) "Have no idea what you are talking about. You just believe everything that the feminists tell you because you would rather do that then think for yourself."

CAN YOU BELEIEVE THAT?

He said, "if you took the time to look up the facts instead of just believing the propaganda you would find the truth is far different to what these women's groups have led you believe." He added, "They use emotive language to frighten everyone and as a means to get large amounts of cash from Government, the police and the Lottery etc, but Men's groups get nothing."

How sexist is that? I mean, even if these women are telling lies, it is ONLY because some man FORCED them too!

This appalling and OUTRAGEOUS LIAR, then said, "Women have 500 refuges and men have none."

Well, I looked at him and said, "That is because women NEVER hit men or children. EVER."

Ha! That told him!


I agree with you bluePurpledong, it is always men's fault and we need to LOCK THEM ALL UP IN JAIL. INCLUDING ME.

IT'S OUTRAGEOUS!
 

Neo111. Well you certainly are cross and outraged. I fully understand "OUTRAGED", but will spare you the gory details. However, not wishing to cause a riot on that saintly Mr Copperfields blog, I have to disagree with you. [Even though I know that your post is wonderfully sarcastic]
I do know from personal experience that some women can be violent towards others.[Wound up by men, of course] I also know that in this bizarre and twisted world of ours, that there are some really good kind men who appear to have been "hooked" by bossy, nagging, controlling wives. Poor souls. Equally, good, caring, sensitive women seem to end up with bastards who hurt them. So, what the fluff has gone wrong here?

I suspect dark forces at work to make humans suffer. But we cannot blame ALL men for all the ills of the world. Nor should we lock them all up, and there really is NO NEED to chop off your penis. I mean, what would you pee with?

Now just calm down, take deep breaths and ask your guardian angel to make life happier for you. Men just need to adjust to a new reality, which is, that they are not the "masters" of the universe, or women!
P.S. I believe that there are a few male refuges around, but there has always been the YMCA to help people.
Balanced Libran
 

I think Neo111's point has merit - in that people are people.

People are violent, not just men. Further up the thread we have a women admiting that she was violent, throwing things around and frightning men.

Can anyone disprove his statistics?
 

The local councils should set up a Domestic Unit, made up of Social Workers etc, who go to these incidents in the first place. The Police should not be attending 90% of these incidents, if they are required the Unit could then contact the Police.
 

Nice idea Freddie but you wouldn't see them after 5pm or at weekends without 2 hours worth of messages being left, no replies or 'I'm 2 hours away, can you find someone else!"
 

People on the dole only have enough for the basics do they? Basics don't include unlimited fags and Stella, Sky Tv and fancy TV's. Big hulking dogs called 'Bruno' also take some feeding. There's always enough for new furniture as well as shown by the number of old itmes piled up in gardens. Mind you, it doesn't leave much left for a bottle of 'Fairy' given the piles of unwashed dishes left all over the house. It gives 'Bruno' something to lick on though when he's tired of attacking neighbours kids.
 

"The local councils should set up a Domestic Unit, made up of Social Workers etc, who go to these incidents in the first place. The Police should not be attending 90% of these incidents, if they are required the Unit could then contact the Police."

Absolutely!

Credit card fraud reported to banks - and then they may or may not (actually, pretty much may not based on reported experience so far) tell the police.

Domestic violence reported to social services.

Next, I think we'd better have-

Murder reported to the council refuse collection dept.

Rape reported to social services.


That's the problem with crime - it just gets in the way of the police doing a good job.

I say let's have the de facto decriminalization of all crime!

(Sarcasm aside, I do have sympathy with police having to deal with utter nonsense, but let's be very careful with this idea of *de facto * decriminalization - surely there's a better way!)
 

Neo, I do hope you're being sarcastic at some womens groups and not me. If you are, quite witty and please stop reading here. If not, do please try to read what I put properly, and not assume. I never said women never do wrong, I have been to plenty of domestics where the woman has either been arrested, invited to stay elsewhere for the night on a 'go-stay-at-your-moms-or-I'll-lock-you-up' basis, or otherwise been the cause of the problem. Stupidity in relationships is an equal opportunities employer.

However, most men have more of a choice to leave before things get out of hand, they are physically stronger and on average are more likely to be in paid employment, thus having the financial independence to move out and not have to stay in the situation. Also, only a moron starts a fight they cannnot win, so some women who WANT to hit their partners will not do so for the pragmatic reason that they will lose, rather than the fact that it is wrong.

2 women a week die through domestic violence, the number of women who kill their male partners is far far less. The proportion of female to male domestic violence victims admitted to hospital with serious injuries is also much much higher. I've met plenty of men who've had a slap round the face or an occasional kick or punch from an angry partner, but only one who even needed to go to hospital. I've been to dozens of domestics where the female party has needed serious treatment, including ones where they've died. Is that enough of a survey for you?

Members of pressure groups with agendas do exist, of course they do, but in 10 years in the job I've never met one. I've met enough victims and offenders to know that they dictate our policy, not the militants who are just as prejudiced as the people they rant on about
 

""Hormones can and do make women super-sensitive at "that" time of the month, and during menopause. What can easily create a few fireworks is male arrogance and insensitivity towards the woman""

Oh - so it's my fault now.....

Brilliant - I'll go and kip in the car again tonight !!
 

I think it is a great idea to include information on the menstrual cycle on domestic violence form filling.

Well - there is information on whether alcohol or drugs are a factor - why not emotional information?

I wonder if we go to certain addresses on a 28 day cycle.

I think I will set up a unit to monitor this?

If we are really serious about tackling DV then we should note the possibility that periods can cause domestics as much as "Stella" and "football".
 

ah yes, the Life at Risk form. I had the pleasure the other day of visiting a couple at their flat thanks to our Supt & completing a life at risk for each against the other. She having attempted to poison him & he beat her to death!!

Know their back together, she's pregnant by him & they were sat happily supping tram juice. ah bless!!

I had to give an Osman warning. Basically telling each that we thought it was a bad idea them being together & there was probability they might harm each other whilst together!! No s**t Sherlock. You couldn't make it up.
 

I am sorry but I am OUTRAGED again! I just could not keep quiet any longer after I was once again approached by the zealot I told you about before.

This time he went a step too far!

He told me that I should think about how sexism ONLY applies when women are the victims! (I was so gob smacked by that statement I could not reply at first) He told me to think about the advertising on TV that shows men being dragged along the ground (Capital One Ad I think he said) and then being dumped in a trash can with the comment, "I've lost interest." He went on to point out that books, magazines, talk shows, soap operas, the press, politicians, the police, the BBC news (This comment really outraged me! The BBC is fair and impartial in all things and not a hot bed of feminism at all!), Channel Four news, the Sun Newspaper have all been as anti male as possible and, he said, constantly reduce men to the role of moron, violent offender, rapist, poor father, an idiot that cannot operate a washing machine, child molestors and so on. This, this..., moron then said, "The police are as bad as everyone as these groups because they have bought the lie that only men offend hook line and sinker and are now so desperate NOT to offend anyone and be PC they almost always arrest the male in DV situations on the assumption that because he is bigger than the women she MUST be innocent. When men report domestic abuse"

Well, you can imagine how I felt! I thought to myself, if this man does not stop soon I am going to need counselling!

He did NOT stop. He just raved on and on. He said, "The police officer attending a domestic abuse incident and refusing to arrest and charge the female is adding to the myth that less women than men abuse, because her offence will not appear in the statistics giving the false impression that it is a male only problem." If that were not bad enough he said, "It does not occur to the police that saying a man can find shelter in a local YMCA or other type hostel is at all sexist. The assuption," he said, "that a male, often deeply distressed who may have to leave his children with an abusive and dangerous spouse should leave the home that he legally worked to provide in the hands of a female abuser who is breaking the law by her abuse and go and stay in a homeless persons unit where there are no skilled staff to attend to him is evidence," This moron said, "of a total lack of understanding on behalf of the police and politicians of the terribly powerful effect sustained abuse can have on men and their children. It is also evidence that the police have a hard, "we don't give a damn" attitude towards men that they dare not have towards women because it would be seen as non PC."

I was stunned! Stunned and OUTRAGED!

He had more to say and before I stop him he was off again.

"He told me that he once recieved a telephone call from an anxious daughter begging him to help her father. This man had been abused for thirty years (NEVER! No woman is that evil. He must have done something to deserve it) and she had witnssed this happening as she was growing up. Her dad, she claimed, was too afraid of ridicule to report his abuse because, in this society, any man reporting abuse is likely to be treated like a liar. (That's because all men are liars I thought!) She finally stabbed him in the stomach with a garden fork after he had brought her the wrong drink as she was sun bathing in the garden."

Now, obviously this is just a made up story! I almost chocked as I laughed. He then told me that he has a file full of such reports from men who have called a helpline for help. Almost all of them, he claims, got no help at all from the police. He claims this is because the police are trained how to think by feminists in Women's Aid and the government. He even said, some of these victims were police officers who felt they dare not tell their colleagues because the political atmosphere at the station was against them.

PREPOSTEROUS! BUNKUM! UTTER RUBBISH! TOTAL ROT!

He claims that anyone who fights for the right of male abuse victims, fathers removed care of their children without good reason, men's rights and the rights of male children in education and health matters will instantly be accused of being "dinosaur male supremacists." Or, "hating women." Or, "Having an agenda." He said, (and this just OUTRAGEOUS!) that these accusations are more about discrediting anyone who bucks the PC left wing system than a reflection of reality.

I BET THAT TONY AND CHERIE WOULD BE ROLLING IN THEIR GRAVES IF THEY HEARD THAT AND ER, WERE DEAD.

Do you know BlueAcneNelly, that when I read this comment by you, I KNEW I could trust it, because you are at the sharp end and if anyone knows about these things you do. You said, "I have been to plenty of domestics where the woman has either been arrested, invited to stay elsewhere for the night on a 'go-stay-at-your-moms-or-I'll-lock-you-up' basis..."

Well, this moronic little right wing extremist must have read your comment, because he had the termerity -- the unmitigated gall to say, "How many males get told to stay at their mum's until morning and why does this man think that such a cooling off period would stop a female abuser abusing when it has failed so often in the past to prevent male abusers abusing?"

I told him, I said, "Women, dear boy (did you note my sarcasm?) NEVER abuse so this is not an issue is it?"

I will not repeat what he called me here.

"Do you think that there is a difference between abusers based on their gender?" He asked me." He did not wait for my reply. Instead he said, "I have met police officers, members of local councils and local government, schoolteachers and social workers who have been fired for daring to ask for help for male victims of abuse. I have spoken with authors such as Erin Pizzy who opened the worlds first abuse shelter in Chiswick, London and who was threatened with losing her life for daring to say men suffer abuse and much of the abuse in homes is mutual. She had to have police escorts wherever she went and her mail was opened by the bomb squad. I have spoken to professors who have also received threats after publishing evidence of male abuse victims in staggering numbers and who were warned to shut up or lose their funding." He then made this outrageous statement. I was OUTRAGED all over again!

"The local copper has no idea of the politics involved in the domestic abuse industry. Who runs it. Why they refuse to help men or the way in which they lie, produce false and misleading statistics, bury the scientific evidence that does not support their feminist claims and even defraud whole governments out of millions of dollars and pounds.

(At this point he told me to look up the "Super bowl Sunday Myth" on Google. Of course, I did not do so. I mean, he is obviously raving mad!)

“If he did know,” He continued, “He might not be so quick to believe all he is told and start asking some very awkward questions. Of course, he could not do so alone because they would take his job. He would need to get together with many others and demand as a group that something approaching justice be evenly distributed to men also."

I told, "This is incitement to mutiny in the ranks!"

He replied, "This is incitement to discover the truth!"

OUT.RA.GEOUS!

I KNOW WHAT THE TRUTH SOUNDS LIKE! HARRIET HARMEN ALWAYS SPEAKS THE TRUTH AS DOES OUR DEAR AND FAITHFUL, JACK STRAW.

I mean, it was dear old Jack who said, "Domestic abuse is men hitting women." If Jack said it, then it must be true! This, this, sexist, agenda following, moronic, right wing, woman hating, offensive and deeply dangerous menace to society should be silenced. Why, if I knew his name I would send it to the same people that met that terrorist De Menzies on the tube train and did such a wonderful job of shutting him up!

When I finally recovered from my shock I said to this, person (and I use the word lightly), "It is people like you -- locked in the 1950's that want to keep women chained to the sink -- that smear the name of the goddesses that walk our hallowed streets. That you dare to say more women than men abuse children, that women abuse men in equal amounts to men and that the damage done by women to male victims can actually be worse than a black eye or broken jaw because the effects can last a life time. To even dare to say that women stalk also and that they indulge in the obviously MALE ONLY pastime of child sex abuse and to imply that the reason we never hear about them is because of a left wing liberal media keeping things hidden from the people, is criminal and people like you should be locked up. LOCKED UP! (I was shouting by now. I felt it was important to raise my voice to make the point. I don't want you to think I would ever shout at a women. No! Never! That is abusive. I would not do it. It's fine if they scream at me. For hours if they want to. That is NOT abusive, that is empowerment. They can insult me as much as they want. That is just assertiveness, but I will never, ever, raise my voice, or even dare to argue with a woman. I could end up in jail for abuse if she dials 999)

I have to go now, my wife wants me to Hoover the house, do the washing, go shopping, change the babies nappy and finish the washing up while she sweats at the hairdressers. I have to be quick because I have a job as well, but I want to be as new-man as I can and she can get quite nasty when she is angry. I am not really allowed on the Internet you see. Or to have any friends. Or to go to bed before her. Or to use the car without her permission. Or to sleep if she wants to talk. Or to watch “men’s stuff” on the TV.

Isn’t she wonderful!

I just had to let you know BluepurplePinkThing that I support your attitude 1000% It is people --like you, ready to face reality-- that has made this country what it is today!

Bye.
 

My old fellow always said...
"Men are logical - women emotional"

Having been to numerous domestics - when the situation is that someone has to go for the night - the bloke is 9 times out of ten the volunteer. Logic...

Why ???
The Wimmins lobby would have you believe because he is (1) At Fault (2) The one that runs and isn't responsible for the children etc
(3) Wants to see his mates and go to the pub.

The reality is..
(1) Because he would rather he was walking the streets and sleeeping on the floor than his misses.
(2) He just wants some peace and quiet - not only for himself but also the children

I am proud to say I have locked up two women at domestics - proud because they were (1) Out of order - committting clear breach of the peace and (2) they deserved it. I would have locked up more but for their husbands and partners pleading that I don't and volunteering to walk out the door so she can stay.

Men don't report domestic violence. Men don't say they are abused. Men keep their victim status far quieter than any woman.
I can't produce statisitics - I can't prove something that isn't reported.
Anyone who attends domestics realises that it is true though.

As my colleague often says - if it is kicking off somewhere - let me deal with the pissed bloke rather than the pissed women.
At least you can reason with most pissed blokes!
 

All very amusing Neo, but it bears no resemblance to what I actually said. For someone with so much time on their hands, you clearly didn't spend much of it reading other peoples comments, you'd rather spend it endlessly ranting, taking the piss out of a username (like THAT proves anything!), missing the point and discounting anything anyone has to say, to the exclusion of the facts.

Kind of like the pressure groups and left wing lunatics who seem to inhabit your world. And who you love so much. I imagine the irony is lost on you.

As you say, bye.
 

Just received an e mail from HMG about your on line petition. Usual HMG double speak. Bring on Boris Johnson at least you can understand what he says even if you don't agree with him.
 

Ah, do not be so sensitive. I was being sacastic and using humour to make some very valid points. I have studied domestic violence for for 18 years and suffered it myself from three different women in my life. Once as a child and twice as an adult. I KNOW the reality of the hell that is abuse and regardless if it is a man, woman, or child going through it, my heart goes out to them because I fully understand their pain and confusion.

What I do not understand is why the domestic abuse industry refuses to reach out to and help male victims but instead, makes the most insensitive and crassly stupid remarks about men being able to take care of themselves. Implying, of course, that no man is ever so deeply hurt, either internally or expernally, that he would need anyone else help. Have those idiots ever looked at the male suicide rates? Have they ever wondered why most homeless people are also male? Have they ever stopped to think about why men do drugs, become alchoholics, turn to crime and normal; men suddenly and inexplicably become violent and kill their wives and often the kids too before killing themmselves? If we spent, as a society, just half as much time lavishing the same care and attention on males as we do on females the incidence of male cancers would plummet. Crime would rapidly fall. Gangs would dissipate and become a memory. Depressive related crime and suicide would be halved. But Hey! Men are big and tough and they can look after themselves right? Look around, it is pretty obvious that the answer is No! Even if they "think" they can.

When I was being abused I called my local cop shop after she stabbed me. The sensitive and caring officer who answered my call listened patiently as I told him what she had done and then, in those bored tones only policemen have, asked, "What did YOU do to HER to make her behave like that?"

There was no rapid responce domestic abuse unit wailing up the street in 5 minutes that there would have been if she had called and said she was stabbed. No one ever came. I knew, the moment he said it that I would get no help from him so I put the phone down. When neighbors asked me why I was bleeding I lied because I was ashamed to admit that she had done it. I lied when she hit me with a lump of wood. I kept silent when she punched me in the nuts while I was driving. I had to be "big and strong" you see. I had to pretend I could cope because no one makes it safe for me to be otherwise. 90% of the men I interviewed about being abused had EXCATLY the same responce to their abuse and only sought help when they realised they could die, the kids were being destroyed by her violence, or they were getting angry and frightened they might hit her back. In which case, THEY would be arrested and charged with abuse, regardless of the circumstances. Of course, women have the legal defence of "provocation" men do not.

Every police officer that shuts his eyes to female violence and makes excuses for them or simply says nothing, is, in my view, a collaborative perpetrator of abuse.The same goes for hospital staff, journalists, politicians, school teachers and on and on.

NO ONE deserves to be abused (I mean real abuse.....not the feminist version which includes "leaving the room in a huff.") but ALL of them deserve the same amount of care and consideration, treatment and resources. To do otherwise is to make one gender more important than the other and stop seeing victims as people.

Niether am I alone in thinking these things. Thousands of others around the world feel the same way including some very powerful people indeed.

The real sexist dinosaurs here are those with their eyes wide shut on these matters.

I was ignoring your points not because they are not of value (though some are clearly just parrot like repeating of "official" policy) but because I had a different and more important series of points to make. You were just the foil. I don't know you but you sounded sensible enough to realise I was just using humour to make a point without having to take six weeks leave for councelling after your feeling were hurt.

I notice though that you ignored all of the major points I was making. That is maybe because you are not sure if they are true. Well, check them out.

Add this little nugget to the pot. At the last time I counted, women's groups were recieving over 50 million pounds per year from various government sources. Men's groups got less than fifty thousand.

Equality! Aint it great?
 

Neo. Behind every comic is a soul hurting. We use humour to "lighten the load" we are bearing, and to express ourselves in a less depressing way.
NO, your wife aint "wonderful", but you are a gem who should be cherished.
I spotted that you were trying to tell people of a problem and make a valid point. It's true that males keep quiet about abuse, generally, particularly if it is their wife/partner who is behaving like a monster. They also tend to keep quiet about childhood sexual abuse, which I know causes a great deal of pain.
The system in the U.K is pretty crap at dealing with victims of childhood sexual abuse. They are judgemental, although they say they are not, they are. They jump to conclusions based upon theory and assumption, [and sometimes even malicious gossip] treat people like guilty criminals and basket cases. They appear to have the mindset that if one has been a victim of sexual abuse in childhood, then you will have abnormal desires towards kids as an adult. Now that IS an insult and emotional abuse which just adds insult to injury. Especially when the experience in childhood was the motivation behind a life mission to protect kids from paedophiles. OUTRAGED Neo, bloody OUTRAGED!
It seems to be the case, that childhood victims of abuse are often bright, sensitive, caring souls who fall prey to abusers, as kids and also as adults.

Something does need to be done to help men, as the saying "Big boys don't cry" just isn't true.
25 years ago I helped a guy who was being attacked on a regular basis. She kept pulling a knife on him and had previously done time for manslaughter -diminished responsibility. He was a nervous wreck and it took months of TLC [as a friend]to help him get over it. Police did not take it seriously, despite her previous history. She was insanely jealous and also threatened my life, and made an attempt upon it. It was treated like a "domestic" rather than attemted murder. I got blamed in court and in her divorce for "stealing her husband". I was slandered and treated appallingly by the system, for saving his life.

Yes, things need to change. Men get just as hurt as women. Some women can be complete bitches and some men can be total bastards. Violence begets violence and it takes the patience of a saint to not shout sometimes. But we are all only human and need to be loved.
 

Over the weekend four Chicago Police Officers responded to a "domestic call" And three where hit by shotgun buckshot from two blasts from an offender. Everyone is ok in blue, but the offender was killed.

In the past 4 days Chicago provided 3 seperate police shootings. Imagine an industrialized city trying to bid for the Olympics will lead the world in officers being shot at outside of a war zone.
 

Are you allowed to ask if Mr Domestic subscribes to a religion that views women as property, and which has a track record of sanctioning the oppression, beating and murder of them rather than letting them enjoy any freedom?

I realise that this is rhetorical question. It's more by way of making a point.
 

Rogerborg, I don't normally answer other peoples posts but methinks you are being a tad provocative...Heaven knows what would happen in todays "Newthink Culture" should someone ask such a question

Jurgen
 

BORN TODAY. A while back you made a comment about a woman admitting on this blog to throwing things about and "frightening" men, which you regarded as "violent".

Come on now, throwing something at a wall [and not at a person] could hardly be described as "violent" behaviour. That was just frustration and a controlled release of anger. The guys probably scattered in shock, unless they are a bunch of total wimps.
Not that I throw stuff about if pushed too far. I tend to shout, and then cry. It's also complete rubbish to regard "shouting" as abuse. For God's sake the army use it to train people into the correct response/behaviour, and to work as a team. This loony government would have us all behaving like Stepford wives, on Prozac!
 

Neo, please do try and pay attention to what I actually said, not what you think I said, or even what you think I think. Like you, my heart goes out to anyone who suffers from domestic violence, be they male or female. My apologies on behalf of my 'colleagues', and I use the word loosely, who treated you badly when you reported things, sounds like they did just as sh*t a job as they did with my friend.

I was never disputing that women can cause arguments as well as men, or that they can start the violence, but the fact remains that the vast majority of people who die or suffer serious injuries in DV situations are female. That is a fact, it's not government spin or me reciting 'the official line' - if I was better at doing that, I'd probably have stripes on by now. I did a straw poll at work yesterday, when as it happened a serious domestic was on screen, and no officer I spoke to had even been to a domestic murder when the man was the one who came off second best. A few knew of woundings such as yours, but not many. The worst male injuries at a domestic I ever saw were inflicted between two gay guys, as it happens, but that's another story!

Similar to a recent previous post, I don't count shouting in a domestic argument as violence (or me and the wife would BOTH have been locked up at some point!), nor do I count throwing things at the wall. Both men and women start domestic violence, but it's usually men who finish it. Your case being an exception to the general rule does not invalidate the rule.

Incidentally, here's an interesting statistic for you I found on a web page about DV - MARAC's (Multi-Agency Risk Assessment Conferencing) was set up a few years ago to assess those most at risk of DV offending and protect them. In the year before they were setup, West Midlands force suffered 25 DV murders, in the year after, they suffered 1. DV unit's aren't all bad!
 

"BORN TODAY. A while back you made a comment about a woman admitting on this blog to throwing things about and "frightening" men, which you regarded as "violent".

Come on now, throwing something at a wall [and not at a person] could hardly be described as "violent" behaviour. That was just frustration and a controlled release of anger. The guys probably scattered in shock, unless they are a bunch of total wimps."

So...destroying things does not count as violence?

Are thrown objects not weapons?

What is the difference between hitting the wall and someone else? Not being a good throw?

But you seem to imply that the women above was not being violent, and that women in general arn't capable of being violent.

Or am I missing something?
 

From a female friends email She has worked with male victims for many years.

As a voluntary domestic violence telephone help-line worker with 15 plus year's experience, I and my colleagues take many calls from male abuse victims who are driven to the point of suicide because they have been falsely accused of hitting their wives or partners when in actually fact it is the other way round and it is their wife or partner who is the abuse perpetrator. No one will believe them and in the UK there is scarcely any professional help and support for them or their children who are witnessing this abuse.

The same happens during divorce and/or separation when false allegations are used by some mothers to keep fathers out of their children's lives. This is a very serious problem and I have deep concerns regarding the Family Court Judges who are putting children at risk by claiming it is not in the best interests of a child to check to see if what a mother alleges is true or false because it would undermine her authority as the primary carer. Mother has her way but in these instances children are the losers. Many Dads commit suicide.

James & Suzanne are your aware of the following?

- That in the year 2002 there were 2,490 male suicides and 752 female suicides and that over a ten year period
27,344 men have died this way? This equates to over 50 male suicides per week in the UK.

- That the number of women committing suicide over the same period has actually reduced year on year. Could this be
linked to and/or explained by the fact that whilst Women's Aid have received year on year increases in funding,
men's groups over the same period have received none?
(Source: Research Development and Statistics Directorate, Home Office).
 

BORN TODAY. Yes, you are missing something. Some people throw things at walls, or even punch walls/doors themselves in a controlled release of anger, RATHER than hurt someone else. I have known men who have done this. Being a lousy "shot" has nothing to do with it.

I did not imply that women were not capable of violence. I know only too well from very personal experience that they certainly are. I received serious physical abuse from my mother as a child, because I told the truth about the sexual abuse being done by my godfather, a cop.

As an adult, I was lucky to survive a serious attempt upon my life, from a schizophrenic, jealous female, who had made numerous attempts upon her husbands life. She got away with it. A violent woman will actually try to do harm once wound up to a certain degree. An angry women will shout and throw things, but not with the intention of harming anyone.

For a very long time, generally, men had the upper hand in "marriage", as they regarded wives as their property, to do with as they pleased. Some were [and still are] obnoxious bullies who treated women like domestic slaves and bed-warmers. Women's wages were generally low and they were dependent upon males for a roof over their heads. They had to put up with a great deal of abuse and disrespect, centuries of it.

And THEN....the cultural revolution of the 1960's took place, which has given women more freedom and legal rights. No bad thing, but men have had their noses put out of joint by this and they do not like it. The tables have turned which has made men feel insecure and confused. They had always been used to having all the power and authority over women.
Women got sick of this decades ago.

Perhaps things have swung too far in the opposite direction now, as some women have become more aggressive towards men. Perhaps because they will no longer tolerate insults, arrogance and/or disrespect towards them.

The breakdown of society has been caused, in part, by an onslaught of pollution in our environment.
Toxic chemicals in the air, water and food, which are "endocrine disruptors" - hormone, nervous and immune systems. People up to the age of 20, and women, are more vulnerable to this than an adult male. The "psyche" of the population has also been "polluted" by negative input from TV, music and video games. TV's, computers and high voltage electricity power sources add to the mix, negative electro magnetic "waves" - like radio waves, unseen but present.

You can then add the final ingredient to this catastrophic coctail, the decline of spiritual values and practices. End result...the undermining of society and some very angry, screwed up, unhappy people, male and female, who take their frustration out on others.

There, now you know how and why it's all gone fubar. [fckd up beyond all recognition!]

Officer Kickbutt
[and no, not literally]
 

For a very long time, generally, men had the upper hand in "marriage", as they regarded wives as their property, to do with as they pleased. Some were [and still are] obnoxious bullies who treated women like domestic slaves and bed-warmers. Women's wages were generally low and they were dependent upon males for a roof over their heads. They had to put up with a great deal of abuse and disrespect, centuries of it.

And THEN....the cultural revolution of the 1960's took place, which has given women more freedom and legal rights. No bad thing, but men have had their noses put out of joint by this and they do not like it. The tables have turned which has made men feel insecure and confused. They had always been used to having all the power and authority over women.
Women got sick of this decades ago.


Ah, the feminist doctrine and selective view of history! It is a view that paints all men as bad "oppressors" of women when in fact, it was very few men who acted in those ways.

Feminists who hold these perverted views place men like St Franicis of Assisi in the same box as Adolf Hitler.

Here is the truth. For hundred even thousands of years, ordinary men had no more power than ordinary women. Both lived in appalling poverty under the rule of the cruel rich. It was men that went to war with those rich oppressors of the people in the English civil war to set the people free from them. They died in their thousands. It led to the vote and just ten years later women also got the vote. It was the majority of men that gave their lives and limbs in two world wars for their wives and children at home. It was men that went down with the ships like the Titanic so the women and kids could be saved. It was men that built the civilisation so their families could be safe. They invented countless machines to make the lives of their wives at home easier and more pleasant.

Yet feminism slanders them and paints them as pigs that hated women and kept them down.

It is one of the sickest, most perverse and most deceptive political movement on earth and those who swallow their lies becaome as sick as those that invented it.

They are filled with excuses for female violence and crimes but have no mercy at all for men because they have believed the lies of a few bitter and disturbed women that run femnist organisations and are able to see the truth because they live in their own paranoid little world.
 

Marriage/Relationships/Domestics.

Early civilizations were nomadic tribes, where the women lived in separate groups, as did the men. Men and women were equal, except for the fact that the women raised the children as well as hunted for food. The men protected them from other "gangs" of nomadic males. As civilization changed from nomads to settled groups, "marriage" was invented to protect male rights of property ownership and passing it on to male heirs. This is where it all started to go wrong, as women and children became the "property" of men. For the last few decades women have been freeing themselves from this oppressive position because far too many men abused their power.

Regarding Judges recognising the parental authority of the mother, which they are now reluctant to undermine. Three cheers for that good news. Any woman who has had the misfortune to go through a divorce/break up with the father of her children, WANTS him to share the responsibility. Single, unsupported parenthood is double hard work, exhausting and certainly NO picnic. I know this for a fact, and that sadly, many men because of injured pride/ego, [and nothing more] whinge and blame the woman who is trying to PROTECT her kids from any further negative experiences involving their dad.

Mothers want fathers to SHARE the "burden", the workload of raising kids. When a mother states that a father is upsetting and damaging the kids by his behaviour and attitude, she will be speaking the truth.
Male arrogance knows no bounds when rejected, especially by their own kids. My kids were frightened by their dad and did not want to see him. He could not accept this and "declared war" on myself, made malicious allegations, got a solicitor to take it to court to force contact. He wanted revenge.

He subjected his very young daughters to the humiliation and indignity of a court welfare investigation and report. He even tried to blame me during the forced contact, in the presence of the court welfare officer. They hated him for that and refused to see him for years. It was a situation entirely of his own making because of his own selfish, self centred arrogance.

Not satisfied with the refusal to see him from his own daughters mouths, he went on to slander me socially and in the health system, because it got him sympathy, which boosted his ego. A lot of the problem was due to the fact of his drinking, and his habit of twisting the facts. A lot of men do this in relationship breakdown to justify themselves, save face and mend their injured pride. Women just get on with life and raising the kids, because they have to.

This is not a "bash men" rant, it is my personal experience and insight into how many of them do behave. They are experts at getting the sympathy vote because the "mean old ex" will not allow contact with the kids. If kids wanted to see their dads, do you honestly believe any mother could stop that? Those kids would drive her NUTS until they got what they wanted. And that is also personal experience, and "logic" from a woman! I have a grown up daughter who has been emotionally damaged by the years of jealous and vindictive snipes of her dad about myself. The marriage failed because he was selfish, unfaithful and a manic depressive who also ruined my life and health. He was Mr Nice Guy until after the wedding and he obviously felt that he could treat me like dirt. Tw*t.

Officer Kickbutt
 

It always amazes me that when women slag off men they almost always add, "This is not an anti male rant but...."

Officer Kick (male) Butt: Ah, how you reveal yourself as a person soaked in feminist propaganda! In the interests of fairness, let's take your stated points one at a time.

"Early civilizations were nomadic tribes, where the women lived in separate groups, as did the men. Men and women were equal, except for the fact that the women raised the children as well as hunted for food. The men protected them from other "gangs" of nomadic males."

There is not one shred of reliable historical or archaeological evidence for this invention of the feminist mind. It is a concoction! A complete and utter fabrication used to justify attacks on marriage and the family. It paints a picture of an Idyllic and noble female, Amazonian existence that has never been a reality.

Now. If I say that it is a fabrication used to justify attacks on marriage and the family I need some evidence to back that statement up. If I cannot produce it, then I am simply inventing stuff the way feminists do, in order to try and paint men as some kind of heroes being "oppressed" by females. (As a man, I DO think men are heroes where women are concerned but that is by the by). So, let's look at the evidence for my assertion by considering what highly influential leaders of the feminist movement teach and say in their writings. For these writings reveal the REAL feminist agenda and their pathological hatred of men.

"We can't destroy the inequities between men and women until we destroy marriage." -from Sisterhood Is Powerful, Robin Morgan (ed), 1970, p.537.

"Since marriage constitutes slavery for women, it is clear that the
women's movement must concentrate on attacking this institution. Freedom for women cannot be won without the abolition of marriage." (Sheila Cronan, 1988 Houston National Organization for Women {NOW} Conference for Women.).

"Being a housewife is an illegitimate profession... The choice to serve and be protected and plan towards being a family-maker is a choice
that shouldn't be. The heart of radical feminism is to change that."
(Vivian Gornick, feminist author, University of Illinois, "The Daily
Illini," April 25, 1981.

"In order to raise children with equality, we must take them away from families and communally raise them." (Dr. Mary Jo Bane, feminist and assistant professor of education at Wellesley College and associate director of the school's Centre for Research on Woman).

"Marriage has existed for the benefit of men; and has been a legally sanctioned method of control over women... We must work to destroy it.
The end of the institution of marriage is a necessary condition for the liberation of women. Therefore it is important for us to encourage women to leave their husbands and not to live individually with men...All of
history must be re-written in terms of oppression of women. We must go
back to ancient female religions like witchcraft." (from "The Declaration of Feminism," November 1971).

"The incest taboo can be destroyed [ED's Note: Stop and think about what this statement is ACTUALLY calling for! These are not the views of a lone nut case but the views of respected and influential leaders of modern feminism and these things are being to taught to our daughters in schools all over the western world!] only by destroying the nuclear family as the primary institution of the culture. The nuclear family is the school of values in a sexist, sexually repressed society... The alternative to the nuclear family at the moment is the extended family or the tribe. The growth of tribe is part of the process of destroying particularized roles and fixed erotic identity. As people develop fluid androgynous identity, they will also develop the forms of community appropriate to it. We cannot really imagine what those forms will be." (Shulamith Firestone - The Dialectics of Sex)

These twisted and paranoid views are being taught to our daughters all over the western world in "Women's Studies" courses in thousands of universities. The aim of these courses are to create hostility against men, marriage and the family and to promote the kinds of savage behaviour seen in some women when they deny fathers access to children by lies, false allegations of abuse, slander and so on and in divorce courts where the "He abused me" story can win great financial gains also. In fact, there are feminist lawyers who actively tell their female clients to use ridicule of his sexual prowess etc., in order to confuse, humiliate and debilitate their husbands and to paint themselves as victims in courts in order to win cases. This behaviour is, of course, ABUSIVE! Other abusive behaviours ignored by feminists include P.A.S (Parental Alienation Syndrome) which is the brainwashing of children to hate their absent parent. Less than 10% of males carry out this behaviour.

Now. I accused feminists of having a "pathological hatred of men" but is that true? Once again, we must look at statements made by their leaders and taught as fact to our daughters to determine if this is true.

"The simple fact is that every woman must be willing to be identified as a lesbian to be fully feminist." (National NOW Times, Jan.1988).

[ED's Note: N.O.W stands for, The National Organisation of Women.]

"Overthrowing capitalism is too small for us. We must overthrow the
whole... patriarch!" (Gloria Steinhem, radical feminist leader, editor of 'MS' magazine).

We are, as a sex, infinitely superior to men..." (Elizabeth Cady Stanton, "One Woman, One Vote", Wheeler, p.58.)

"All sex, even consensual sex between a married couple, is an act of violence perpetrated against a woman." .... "You grow up with your father holding you down and covering your mouth so another man can make a horrible searing pain between your legs." (Catherine MacKinnon - Prominent feminist scholar at the University of Michigan and Yale)

"I believe that women have a capacity for understanding and compassion which man structurally does not have, does not have it because he cannot have it. He's just incapable of it." (Former Congresswoman Barbara Jordan)

[ED's note: Are we starting to see where the real “sexism” is coming from yet?]

"I want to see a man beaten to a bloody pulp with a high-heel shoved in his mouth, like an apple in the mouth of a pig"....." Under patriarchy, every woman's son is her potential betrayer and also the inevitable rapist or exploiter of another woman. " ...."for a woman, the home is the most dangerous place in the world! " .... "The traditional flowers of courtship are the traditional flowers of the grave, delivered to the victim before the kill. The cadaver is dressed up and made up and laid down and ritually violated and consecrated to an eternity of being used." .... "Heterosexual intercourse is the pure, formalized expression of contempt for women's bodies." (Andrea Dworkin).

"Probably the only place where a man can feel really secure is in a maximum security prison, except for the imminent threat of release." (Germaine Greer)

"Men who are unjustly accused of rape can sometimes gain from the experience." (Catherine Comin, Vassar College. Assistant Dean of Students).

"All men are rapists and that's all they are." (Marilyn French, Author; and advisor to Al Gore's Presidential Campaign)


"To call a man an animal is to flatter him; he's a machine, a walking dildo." Scum Manifesto. (Valerie Solanas)

[ED's note: S.C.U.M was thought to stand for, The Society for Cutting Up Men. Solanas produced the SCUM Manifesto and is infamous for shooting Andy Warhol and his friend for the crime of being male. Her manifesto is still reprinted and taught in Women's Studies courses today. Painted as a heroine by the feminists, she was actually a paranoid schizophrenic.]

"I feel that 'man-hating' is an honourable and viable political act, that the oppressed have a right to class-hatred against the class that is oppressing them." (Robin Morgan, Ms. Magazine Editor)

I could go on and on but to do so would be to labour the point already adequately made. Feminists have, teach and spread utter contempt for men based not on truth but on a paranoid political viewpoint imported into America during the 1960's from Russia and then exported around the western world. It is this thinking that led to the family court system we now have where fathers are being systematically removed from their own children’s lives after often (but not always) exaggerated claims of cruelly, false accusations of abuse (both sexual and physical) and the denigration of their characters by women taught to hate men by the insidious and evil feminist mind set. It is also the reason why the feminist dominated abuse industry refuses to aid male victims of abuse and concocts statistics that try to show 98% of all victims of abuse are female. They use their powerful lobbying techniques to convince politicians, the police, medical staff, educators and so on, that this lie is the truth and they produce slogans such as , "Two women a week die of abuse" [Ed's Note: They NEVER mention male victims or statistics as a matter of carefully controlled policy except to say, "there are too few to worry about." And, "Women only use violence in self defence." This is called, "Having your cake and poisoning it." Otherwise known as lying!] to promote the idea that violence against females is at epidemic proportions when the truth is, 99% of all relationships between men and women see no such violence at all! The figure of two women a week represents a number too large, that is true. However, place it next to the figures for female fatality for say, car crashes, accidents in the home, cancers and so on and 104 deaths through domestic abuse per year is a tiny statistical amount and certainly NOT an epidemic proving how men are "controlling" and "oppressing women in the home." Instead, it becomes a device used by feminists to promote both fear of men and marriage, EXACTLY as their stated agenda says it should!

This nasty, sexist, perverse, damaging, violent, abusive, paranoid and almost utterly false teaching, has reached into politics, education, the media, police training courses, social policy thinkers institutions, the UN, the EU, medicine, UNESCO, legal society and so on, almost unchallenged. Yet, a closer look at it reveals that approximately 80% of the foundational principles feminism is built on are fabrications, exaggerations, outright lies or misunderstandings of both historical truth and current reality. Cherry picking unpleasant "facts" (often these so-called "facts" do not stand the test of examination) and then applying these applying "evidences" to history to give a false impression of that history. For example; feminists "scholars" will scour the personal letters of women from say, the 18th century until they find some written by a bitter person about how "oppressive" and "controlling" her husband is. This poor souls letters (whose content may or may not be justified) is then added to the other letter letters written in a similar tone by other women of that period. This collection of letters is then published and used as "evidence" to show "conclusively" that men have "oppressed" women for hundreds of years. However, these feminist scholars are not looking for a balanced historical view but a view that backs up their own agendas and personal mind sets. Therefore, they ignore a vast pile of letters written by women praising the efforts of their husbands to love, care and provide for their families and wives. Thus the "impression" given and taught to our kids, is a false one. It is useful though because it covers men in guilt and shame and thus, "disempowers" them through the use of ridicule, while also painting women as victims of the cruel and nasty "patriarchy."

It is insulting to men AND women because it demeans both sexes and because it is intellectually, socially, as well as personally, dishonest.

I was first alerted to the hidden and real agenda of feminism when I was handed a leaflet by mistake by a feminist activist on a street corner in the early 1970’s which read, "How to get rid of the pig (man) in your life and keep his house, money and the kids."

Feminism is a plague on all of our houses and unless we wake up and do something about it, they will destroy the family and marriage and produce a back lash from society that will end in tragedy. Only a stupid person could fail to see the incredible damage being done to our children today by the single mother culture that feminists set out to create. It's destructive and ruinous consequences are plainly demonstrated in the lost, fatherless and aimless youth we all see hanging around on street corners and entering into the criminal justice system. Male suicide rates really are at epidemic proportions and a great many of those males are little more than children.

This vicious and deceptive brainwashing of our children by a relatively small group of paranoid, hate-filled women is evidenced in your thinking Officer Kickbut and for your own mental health I would urge you to take another long at the reality behind what you have been taught.

Our silence on these things must end and we MUST be prepared to take another and much closer look at the claims of feminism and it's communist political roots. [ED's Note: In Soviet Russia, feminist policies were enacted for 70 years and were so disastrous they threatened to destroy society altogether. Gorbachev finally dismantled them when he came to power.] Failure to do this will result in social upheaval and years of unnecessary pain and injustice for ALL of us.

Naturally, anyone who does look again at these claims of feminism will be accused of being a “dinosaur” trying to stem the tide of “women’s liberation” and to, “lock them back into the kitchen” and so on ad infinitum because that is how they always silence their critics. Through ridicule and personal attack.

Right Officer Kickbut?

“He was Mr Nice Guy until after the wedding and he obviously felt that he could treat me like dirt. Tw*t.”
 

WELL! I have just read Neo's comments and I am OUTRAGED!

Those quotes are obvious lies! No women would EVER say things like that and all feminists are saints who love men, marriage and the family.

OUTRAGEOUS!
 

Well Neo, you do have a bee in your bonnet. You also make a lot of assumptions about myself which are way off the mark. What I wrote, which appears to have "sent you off on one", was my own personal life experience. I have never looked into what the feminists have been saying. Never read any feminist books or whatever. Never been to any meetings. Never done any "women's studies"...And NEVER "hated" men, although some have given me good reason to.
Out of choice I wanted to be a wife and mother, a homemaker. I wanted to be cared for and protected by my husband/partner. I was deeply disappointed. I was unlucky.

Your reaction to my personal story, which is both true and full of tragedy, hints at contempt and you being a hater of women. How sad that you misunderstood me and got me quite wrong sunshine. Your rant was very educational however and does actually prove the point, which is that men need to adjust their thinking and attitude towards women. Less arrogance, more respect and the world will be put to right. Peace and Love Dude.

Officer Kickbutt
 

P.S. Neo111, assuming that you are a police officer, you really should know better than to make wild assumptions about people when you do not have all the facts about their lives. You have no knowledge whatsoever of how I was treated by my ex's. A bit of humility on your part would be a positive step in the right direction.
O.K.
 

"Your reaction to my personal story, which is both true and full of tragedy, hints at contempt and you being a hater of women."

Naturally, anyone who does look again at these claims of feminism will be accused of being a “dinosaur” trying to stem the tide of “women’s liberation” and to, “lock them back into the kitchen” and so on ad infinitum because that is how they always silence their critics. Through ridicule and personal attack.

Right Officer Kickbut?

"...hints at contempt and you being a hater."

I rest my case.

"Your rant [ED Note: It's strange the way women say men never talk and then when we do they tell us to shut up. Hmmm.]was very educational however and does actually prove the point, which is that men need to adjust their thinking and attitude towards women. Less arrogance, more respect and the world will be put to right."

Did you actually read it? If so, you SHOULD have seen where the arrogant disrespect is coming from....and it is not men.

"I have never looked into what the feminists have been saying. Never read any feminist books or whatever. Never been to any meetings. Never done any "women's studies"...And NEVER "hated" men, although some have given me good reason to."

You don't have too have done any of these things. Pick up any number of female magazines. Watch any number of soap operas. Watch endless domestic sit-coms. Watch the BBC news and Channel four news and read the Sun "Newspaper" (who's editor, Ms Wade abused her husband and though arrested, was never charged. There's a change then!) Read almost any of the government issued booklets or policy documents on domestic abuse. Read any number of female marketed books. Watch countless movies on day time TV about men abusing women. Read the Gaurdian. Listen to people like Jack Straw and Harriet Harm-Men and you will be soaked in feminist doctrines and develop your hatred all by yourself.

Wake up and smell the coffee. It is everywhere.

It is not a question of men adjusting their attitudes but of SOCIETY adjusting their attitudes. You attitide is typical of female sexism but it just escapes you totally. You do not flinch from bad mouthing your ex in public because he is not able to defend himself and if he gave his side of the story I am willing to bet you would quickly revert from "strong women" to "poor victim." You show all the classic symptoms of a P.A.S parent (study Kim Bassinger for another example) but you have no concept of your own levels of bitterness, instead you imply, that you were a saint who never put a foot wrong in your realationship and your ex was cruel both to you and your children.

Many women talk a lot about ex husbands needing to face their responcibilities (read: Pay me lots of money for years without daring to want to see the kids) but very little about their need to also love the children and care for them.

If men truly did treat women and ex wives the way women treat them women would be out screaming the place down. Because men are more reserved, it would be foolish of anyone to think they care less. All over the world, the growing fury of men gives the lie to that idea. It is a fury that is going beyond mere hatred and we need to wake up to it.

Any man who objects to female behaviour is automatically called a "women hater" or "sexist" and on and on and yawn..."
 

Neo. You are obsessed and manic.
You did not actually read and understand what I said. You are being an oppressive bully, ranting on your soapbox, probably because your wife has you by the short and curlies - for whatever reason.
This blog is about "marriage" and relationships. But you seem to have a huge problem with a woman's personal experience. Experience which ALSO includes being the victim of extreme violence at the hands of females, plus sexual abuse at the hands of males. [in childhood]

You are WRONG about me.
I am not a "feminist", nor have I been indocrinated with their ideas. I do not watch BBC, Channel 4, read the Sun, nor the Guardian, nor do I watch much telly/soaps. You, for whatever reason just appear to want to have a go at me for having a personal opinion, based upon my own life experience and my own feelings.

Are you saying that I am not allowed to feel the way I do about my experiences? Are you saying that I am not allowed to FINALLY put my side of things, having been unfairly treated for a very long time? [By males and females.]
And I never told you to "shut up", however you do seem to be digging yourself into a hole.

I am not interested in "feminism", nor "maleism", nor in arguing with you. It was constant arguments with my ex husband [who was not very nice] that made me ill.
He slagged me off behind my back for years, slurred my name and reputation. That affected all areas of my life, including friendships. You made a previous comment about how awful your wife is, and that you are not allowed to have any friends. Was that a lie or the truth? Because THAT is what has been done to me.

Officer Kickbutt - which is a "joke" name Neo.
 

I would consider trying to contribute something - but I fail to see the point.

All I'll say is...Kickbutt, enough of the personal attacks?

"Neo. You are obsessed and manic."

Accusations of serious mental disturbances.

"You are being an oppressive bully"

You mean that he's disagreeing with you? His posts include less personal attacks then yours do.


"...probably because your wife has you by the short and curlies - for whatever reason."

Again, your not helping matters.

Take him out, point by point, if you can. DEBATE him - who knows, he might even reply in kind.

Neo, while I see what you're trying to do, please, please try and stay focused?

You do tend to fire off huge posts at the drop of a hat. Shorter, and pointer please?
 

Take him out, point by point, if you can. DEBATE him - who knows, he might even reply in kind.

Neo, while I see what you're trying to do, please, please try and stay focused?

Point taken.

Aologies.
 

Born Today. I made no "personal attacks" but have been personally attacked, for being a female with a life experience which is controversial from a male point of view. I have simply defended myself and given a balanced insight into the "problem" in marriages.
Whilst it appears to be acceptable for males on here to have a narrow and somewhat prejudiced view of females; A female, stating she has been a victim [and survivor] of serious abuse appears, to get ridiculed, undermined and slagged off.

Sorry guys, I did not realise that this was a "men only" blog devoted to the misogynists in the force.


Neo the Leo. If you are having a tough time at the minute, it's all down to the planet Saturn. Things will get better in September.

Peace and Love. O.K.
 

In this existence of evolution, is it worth pondering that misogynists have evolved rather than just appeared?
Ask any pillock who has been married /involved more than once! I include myself.
Perhaps we have all had bad experiences but some of us just 'get on with it'
I suppose we all have points of view but people become what they are due to experience and if it doesn't wear too well with the 'cap wearer' Too bad.
 

Fair enough - no more Mr Nice Guy.

Lets see. *Born Today. I made no "personal attacks"*

No, really? Accusations of mental health issues, derogatory comments, insults and accusations don't count?

Gee, what IS a personal attack here then?

Now, this is a POLICE blog. So lets look at your next phrase. "...but have been personally attacked...". Ok, well that's an accusation of attack, without witness, evidence, or even a defendant. Not to mention a serious bait'n'switch. Stick to topic, please.

Your "balanced insight into the "problem" in marriages" is anything but balanced. Balance would require you to point out that half of women never experience domestic violence of any sort.

You've refused to engage. Your position is purely made from your "I'm a victim, pity me, and take my word as literal truth".

Read what the others have said - they don't appear to hate women, as you claim - they are not misogynists.

They just take things with a pinch of salt.

"Whilst it appears to be acceptable for males on here to have a narrow and somewhat prejudiced view of females"

Right...and who said they didn't believe you? Who called you a liar? What view is it they have?

Enlighten me, because you're the only person here I've seen (apart from Neo) with a straightjacketed view of women - and your view appears to be that they are perfect, angelic beings.

So either sit down and talk, or shut up, stop attacking people and learn how to DEBATE.

*Gets a cup of soothing coco*

Now, you were saying?
 

"Enlighten me, because you're the only person here I've seen (apart from Neo) with a straightjacketed view of women - "

I can promise you that I have no "straight jacketed view of women." Do not confuse my opinions of abusive women with those of non abusive women. Niether believe that I hate ALL women because I am angry with SOME women.

I have relationships with BOTH kinds of women and those that know how to love are treasures indeed and I value them highly. Those that know hoe to abuse are too many and always claim that those who complain about their behaviour hate women. But then, they would say that wouldn't they. Prisons are full of the innocent also.
 

Born Today. What do you mean by "fair enough, No more Mr Nice Guy?" Perhaps you will forgive me for not having the energy or inclination for a "debate" about "feminism", sparked by Neo. I have no interest in that topic.

My comment to Neo saying he was a gem who should be cherished has not caused this rant on feminism. He's correct in that some men are hero's, some are.

I have not portrayed women as "perfect saints" at all. You have misunderstood what I have said, got the wrong end of the stick. Perhaps you choose to "misunderstand", just to pick a fight.

Women can be the cause of much pain to men. We are equal.

Those who cling on to a relationship which is causing grief, can become damaged by continuing it, despite pain and arguments. Best to walk away from "fights" and agro. "Feminism" is not my specialist subject, sorry, I'll have to pass on that one.
Oh yes, some of my greatest friends are men, so what are you on about.
I say tata now, as I have other things to think about. Thanks for the chat. God Bless, Hero's ALL.

Peace and Love Dudes, O.K.
 

Anonymous said..."My comment to Neo saying he was a gem who should be cherished has not caused this rant on feminism. He's correct in that some men are hero's, some are."

Some people cannot face the reality that some women can be as evil and sick as some men. They seem to feel guilty, as if by doing so, they are being disloyal to their mothers.

I know exactly what you meant anon when you called me a gem and I thank you for it, but it did not lead me to say anything other than what I was going to say. Don't let the narrow minds on here get to you. For them, the staus quo is always the god to worship and they are frightened to look outside of the box.

I can't say more than this because apparently it is wrong to make long comments on blogs and expand an idea. Only word-bites are allowed. I guess, so that people will not have to think too much.
 

Morning again.

Neo, it's not such much long posts arn't allowed, more a case of 4 page long posts complete with lots of quotes from feminists is a little...long.

Kickbutt, what can I say? If you can't see the difference between my posts, you have no idea of sarcasm.

Further, you say "Women can be the cause of much pain to men. We are equal.". Well, earlier on you said...

"Come on now, throwing something at a wall [and not at a person] could hardly be described as "violent" behaviour... This loony government would have us all behaving like Stepford wives, on Prozac!"

If a man was throwing things around and shouting, you can bet your butt that it'd be counted as violent behaviour.

"The guys probably scattered in shock, unless they are a bunch of total wimps."

And you wouldn't find it frightening? Throwing things around, lots of anger, suitable verbal abuse...oh, no. Its by a women, at men. Their wimps.

Women arn't violent.

So I find your U turn...suprising.
--

Neo, I think I recognise your writing style. If I was t oask you how Doc E is, and if "Steven" has been deployed, would you know who I'm talking about?
 

I work in a division that has one of the highest rates of domestic incidents in the country. We go to the same houses time and time again, usually for trivial rubbish or when one of them wants the other out for some reason and wants us to get rid of them. They are usually allowed back in around the time their benefit is due.

I have come up with a policy the reduced demand on Police by these leeches.

Three strikes and you are out.

First domestic - offender removed advice given.
Second domestic - offender removed warning given to separate from offender assistance given.
Third domestic - offender removed both advised that we will not attend again.
If people can't get on they should split up not call the Police when they get fed up with each other.
This might give us time to help th people that genuinely need us.
 

Born Again, who appears to be having a go and twisting the facts...you have a hostile and picky attitude, and I'm afraid 'tis you who does not recognise sarcasm in my posts. Silly boy. You also keep insisting that I maintain that women are not violent, when I am a victim of female violence against me. Or is that not clear enough. It disabled me, physically, via extreme stress which caused the illness M.E. A neurological illness.

Go pick on someone else, bully.

O.K.
 

Neo. What you wrote was a bit overwhelming, and a bit of a shock. People being horrible to each other doesn't make pretty reading. But it did make me think about how it's all messed up and "equality" was misunderstood on both sides, male and female.

I believe that true equality is recognising that men and women complement each other, with different skills, strengths.

Resentment can creep in when one partner exerts "control" over the other. Resentment destroys everything in its path.

Thank you for your advice and I will try not to let them get to me. You are right, and I can be a bit sensitive, not having the thick skin of a rhino.

IS THIS FACE BOVVERED?

TOO RIGHT, This face is bovvered.
It's bovvered Neo, cos you're not happy and hate "feminists."

Oh yes, I'm bovvered, cos you growled at me, and it aint fair.
Blair might not be f'in bovvered, but I am bovvered Neo. So bovvered that I AM OUTRAGED!

How dare prople be so mean to others. Yes I'm bovvered, it's sad and very glum....and I wish it would stop raining. Please God. Perhaps the whole "listening" nation could all say a prayer at the same time, for the winds which bring this rain to go and rain where it is needed. I'm bovvered.

Yes I am bovvered, about the state of the planet and all the suffering that goes on. People worship the god "money" more than anything else, sometimes.

Is this face bovvered Neo?
Tony's face aint bovvered, but mine is, that you are unhappy.
This face is bovvered, Neo.
O.K.
 

Oh dear. Another debate free post. Still, lets have a look.

"Born Again, who appears to be having a go and twisting the facts..."

Hmm. All I'm doing is quoting you. Much like most written evidence, really.

"you have a hostile and picky attitude". Picky....picky....you mean that I read what you write, and expect it to be consistant? Damned right I'm picky.

As to hostile - I thought words weren't violence...

"Silly boy" <-- Insult, check.

"You also keep insisting that I maintain that women are not violent" Well, that is the position you seem to have presented. Please, provide me a quote. Show me I'm wrong.

"when I am a victim of female violence against me" And did I deny this? But we're talking domestic violence, and what is and isn't violence. At least, thats what I thought we were talking about.

And in your case, your position that a little shouting and throwing by a women isn't violence, and that if it scares men they're just wimps.

"...which caused the illness M.E..." Your honour, relevence? The cause of M.E. isn't known. There's over a dozen possible causes, which evidence pointing in every direction.

More to point, it doesn't contribute to the debate here - if thats really what your here to do.

And your final remark..."Go pick on someone else, bully.".

Hmmm. Do I call people names? Do I accuse people of being ill? Do I not listen to what people say, and respond to it?

Thats not a bully.

If you mean I'm a man who disagrees with you...and does this in public...there are other words for this.

But since we're talking about my hostility, can I remind you that most of my posts, except this and the last, have been requests for moderation and the odd question.

About as hostile as a small squirrel.

By the way, why do you hide behind Anonymous?
 

Is this face bovvered Neo?
Tony's face aint bovvered, but mine is, that you are unhappy.
This face is bovvered, Neo.
O.K.

Ha Ha! Wonderful responce.

As long as we are BOVVERED by the right things huh? The things that divide our people and promote sick behaviour under the guise of "Tolerance" "Equality" and "Justice." You know, like that phrase, "In the best interests of the child" and which is used to strip children from good parents because it is in the, "best interest" of the left wing anti family brigade.

Born Today: Sorry, this went over my head:-
" How Doc E is, and if "Steven" has been deployed"

I know my post with quotes was a little long but the point had to me made and driven home. I could have just quoted tow of the feminist leaders but I was worried the readers would dismiss that as just two nutters in a sea of feminist ideas. I have learned through experience that this is how feminists dismiss the argument when only a few of their leaders are quoted. Also, I wanted everyone to see just how "deep the rabbit hole goes" to quote Morpheos from the movie, "The Matrix."
This is VERY serious stuff. Much more than just an anti-feminist rant. It is a real and present danger.

Can I just say this. I am not against women having rights or being treated with respect or care. What I am against is when that respect and care are DEMANDED with disrespect and carelessness. When I am insulted and my family are attacked. Or, when my son and daughter are taught lies in school to prop up a theoretical political ideology that should have died a death in the 1970's and one of those kids is filled for hate for the other, while the other is filled with false guilt just for being male.

Anonymous claims not to be a feminist or to have been indoctrinated by them. Yet, she began her defence of her statements by quoting, word for word, the lie about the ancient, mythical tribe of Amazonian women who hunted for themselves before marriage was "invented" which is one of the foudational (and false) principles of feminist thought -- well, excuse me for not believing a word about her innocence concerning all things feminist.

Good women deserve good treatment and respect. They are the glue that hold the family together and a good woman can mould a child's mind (along with a good dad) to make a friend of all of us. Bad women and bad men create bad children that we have to fight to bring to the courts and what passes for justice.

What we must all learn to do, I think, is be more discerning and realistic about matters and the abuse issue is a case in point. For those who want to make a real difference in matter of abuse and understand the dynamics begind it, I would highly reccomend the writings of Erin Pizzey. You can find them online. She is a smart, clear-thinking and authoratative voice on the issue. She clears up much of what we do not understand about those who go back again and again to abusive homes. She explains the reality behind the phenomenon of mutual abuse and gives cautionary advice about being misled by the "victim" attitude of many abusers pretending they are innocent.

We are too quick to be fooled by the crying female claiming "its all HIS fault. Please help me officer, I am afraid." Abusers OFTEN hide as victims and only clever questioning can reveal who is really abusing who or whether they are BOTH at it.

The simple truth is that the feminist model of abuse thinking and responce fails and it fails because it is based on untrue, injust, and false assuptions about "power and control" being a male only issue. It also fails because it does not address the abusive female issue except to make excuses for them.

Sometimes (very often in fact) the "terrorist" in the family, wears a skirt.
 

PS. You can read Erin Pizzey's seminal work on abuse, "Prone To Violence" here:

http://www.bennett.com/ptv/

Just a note of interest. The publishers and book stores that distributed this book where threatened with fire bombing if they continued to sell it. Erin, the authoress, was threatened with death for writing it and had to flee to America.

Sisterhood is powerful......Right?

Who are the REAL abusers?
 

Neo. The information about early humanity being nomadic tribes came from a credible programme on anthropology. I'm really NOT a "feminist" and hate the whole you wanting to put me in a tick-box catagory. Not a feminist Neo, and not telling fibs. Oh no, NOT a feminist, trust me on that one.

Because I am OUTRAGED NEO!!!
I AM DEEPLY OUTRAGED BY THE SO CALLED "FEMINIST" GERMAIN GREER.
Nasty, bitchy, bitter and twisted Germain Greer, slaggin off Diana. You bitch. How dare you be so venomous about Diana, who cannot defend herself. It's REALLY BAD KARMA Germain, to slag off the soul departed. If that sort of attitude, negative, is what "feminism" is YOU CAN STICK IT WHERE THE SUN DON'T SHINE!

Diana was a leader, an organizor, a DOER, she made things happen, good things for humanity, for people who were suffering. Diana did more "good works" in her short life, and helped millions more, than bitter and twisted Germain Greer.

So, that's "sisterhood" is it? Bitchy, negative, cup half empty view of people, life. SO SAD.

"Feminist"? Don't INSULT ME by that unjust accusation Neo.

I AM OUTRAGED NEO, by the offensive remarks Germain Greer made about Diana, Princess of Wales. Diana was a "live-wire" exceptional person, not perfect, like the rest of us. She does not deserve to be slagged off in "death", which shows the greatest disrespect for a "sister" who did more for women, kids, all people, than Germain Greer has, or ever will do.
OUTRAGED NEO. How dare she.

O.K.
 

"Neo. The information about early humanity being nomadic tribes came from a credible programme on anthropology."

Really. Which one?

Show us a link to a study. Give us some references, tell us the program name - I'd be satisfied with a wikipedia link.

Lets see...

"As civilization changed from nomads to settled groups, "marriage" was invented to protect male rights of property ownership and passing it on to male heirs."

Really. Thats a suprise. I always believed that marriage predated reliable history - or, indeed, ANY history.

Marriage has a long history in all the abrahamic religions - over three thousand years, to the point where the vast majority of evidence left is stone - building, tablets and bones.

Going back further, to a time before property rights (and therefore the time of hunter/gather culture) AND claiming such a detailed knowledge as you did would require more than the handful of bones and stone tools.

It would require detailed information, vastly more then is available. We don't know that much about groups that lived around 100bc in England - despite being documented (in passing) by the romans. Let ALONE before the written history began, about 6000 years ago.

So, again, I ask, show us some proof. Some evidence.
 

TRIBES.
The programme I mentioned, was I think, The History of Mankind, or something like that. It was on TV years ago. Can't remember which channel and quite frankly, who cares.
This is a blog for cops who want to contribute comments, opinions, on the current topic, and occaisionally they go "off topic".

Born Today appears to be looking for an argument and was "insulted" to be called "silly boy". Oh dear, he must be a 30 something government sniper, and not a "boy in blue".
For the record, M.E has been classed as a neurological illness since 1969, by the World Health Organisation. Research in this country concluded that abuse/severe stress WAS the cause of the illness, coupled with exposure to environmental contaminants.

Pity that "Born Today" thinks he has the knowledge and life experience which makes him far superior to anyone else with a different point of view.
Better if he was a "Born Again" with an attitude of tolerance and a spirit of generosity.

The mean minded are not just in the ranks of "feminists" Neo.
 

"The programme I mentioned, was I think, The History of Mankind, or something like that. It was on TV years ago. Can't remember which channel and quite frankly, who cares."

Well, after a quick search I've been unable to find said program, but this is hardly a suprise, given the detailed information you've provided.

"This is a blog for cops who want to contribute comments, opinions, on the current topic, and occaisionally they go "off topic"."

You're the one who brought up the structure of ancient civilisations...

"Born Today appears to be looking for an argument" Looking for an arguement? Nope....I just read what people write then ask questions. Because otherwise my point of view will never change - although you're hardly doing a good job here.

"and was "insulted" to be called "silly boy"" Was it not ment as an insult? That is why school children call others names, right?

"he must be a 30 something government sniper" Oh dear. You realy think crying *He's not one of us* is going to help here?

"M.E has been classed as a neurological illness since 1969, by the World Health Organisation." - And prior to that was recognised as early as 1956. Your point?

"Research in this country concluded that abuse/severe stress WAS the cause of the illness" - Really? And which country is this? And in which journal was it published? Because I'm either really behind in my reading, or they still haven't narrowed down the cause of M.E. (or C.F.S.) down from the dozen possibles they have, now.

Including stress, I will give you. Stress as one of a dozen...

"Pity that "Born Today" thinks he has the knowledge and life experience which makes him far superior to anyone else with a different point of view."

I think its quite clear here who is the mean one. I've not called names, refered to people in the third person, refused to debate points, termed others outsider...

I've given you easy ways to win - show me in a quote where I'm wrong about your point of view on violent women. Show me some evidence.

If its mean to require evidence, how do you survive in court?
 

Born Today. I am not interested in "debating" with you, nor answering your questions. I am not on trial, nor in court. Your attitude is unpleasant and aggressive. I don't give a toss if you cannot find a programme I watched YEARS ago about how civilization developed.

The research on M.E was done a while ago by Professor Hooper et al of Sunderland University and IGNORED by the government's CMO and working group on M.E.[and CFS, which is a different illness]

I do not consider the woman who threw the crash helmet at the wall to have committed an act of violence. She was just angry.

My ex husband aimed an object at me and lobbed it, many years ago, I just moved out of its way, without being "frightened". He also, in temper, punched a door, leaving a hole in it. He suffered from mood swings, manic depression, which I did not understand before I married him. However, he never crossed the line and was violent with me.

PEOPLE, males and females can and do get annoyed with each other. Some may shout a bit, or throw something at a wall. That does not always make them "violent".

And incidentally, I am not obliged to answer your questions, nor "debate" because you DEMAND that I do. I have nothing more to say to you B.T.

O.K.
 

I think I struck a nerve...
 

It's what you were aiming for. :)
 

Neo. You said that sometimes an "abuser" will claim to be a "victim". This is true. It has been done on me, numerous times, by males and females, because I blew the whistle on their abusive actions. I became the "official scapegoat" for being such a bold, audacious child who stood up to them. Quite a life path, I can tell you, although I wouldn't wish it on an enemy, never mind a friend.

The deepest hurt to a genuine "victim", is to be treated harshly and falsly accused by the people who have in fact dished out the abuse. But never mind eh, KARMA WILL CATCH THEM UP. Oh yes, no doubt about that! They will suffer exactly what they made me suffer, and for just as long.

A wise gem of a cop told me as a child "special", that "the end justifies the means", even if it did seem unfair. He also said that.."It is better to be thought of as "bad" but are in fact good, than to be thought of as "good", but are in fact bad". Those words of wisdom and care helped me deal with the bizarre situation as a child, of going undercover, being a "sleeper" until it was time for me to "wake up" and do my job.

Who ARE the "real abusers"? They would be the people who continue to cover up about the abuse and murder done to kids in the 1950's, including my sister. The REAL abusers are those in government who would still like to maintain the status quo, of the victim [me] being the scapegoat. That is easier for them than acknowledging the truth and paying me what I was promised. So where does that buck stop? The Treasury? Oh yeah, and there are NO "feminists" in that system Neo, as they discriminate against disabled mothers/ female carers.

Officer Kickbutt
 

Did anyone see the statement given to the press after the conviction today, of Chris Langham on charges of child pornography.

He was aquitted of an idecent assault that was reported some 9 years after the event, after the porn charges came to light?. Couldn't see that one going far in the absence of any corroborating evidence.

It was a joint effort from a Detective Inspector fron Kent Police and Mr Goss, a senior Crown Prosecutor.

The clearest demonstartion of how not to conduct a press statement.

The DI gave his opinion of the conviction and the crime convicted. Fair enough I say. They have proved there and Langam has been remanded pending reports. Well done!

Then he proceeded to get entangled in a media frenzie and losing control of his own press statement and answering questions that were not pertinant to the case to the matters convicted.

The opinion of the alleged victim of the indecent assault, asked by a reporter is not relevant and a question that should have been refused. He was not convicted, end of story. He is inocent of that matter.

The CPS man pipes up with how convicing the case of the indecent assault was after the jury had aquitted, articulating the centiment that he was guilty of that matter.

Having dealt with some sex offences in my time, it is clear that the CPS do not always charge on the evidence, but how imotive the issue. (Rape, not enough convictions, etc..)If only we charged on facts alone!

Politics has a lot to answer for.

Lets just stick to the facts, it's much easier that way. Don't turn it into some indigified side show outside the court. It looks very unproffesional.
 

Governments are always respectable right? I mean, that is why they govern because we always vote for sensible people to run things for us......Right?

Look at this, from Germany. I got this in my mail today from a trusted source.

BERLIN, July 30, 2007 (LifeSiteNews.com) - Booklets from a subsidiary of the German government's Ministry for Family Affairs encourage parents to sexually massage their children as young as 1 to 3 years of age. Two 40-page booklets entitled "Love, Body and Playing Doctor" by the German Federal Health Education Center (Bundeszentrale für gesundheitliche Aufklärung - BZgA) are aimed at parents - the first addressing children from 1-3 and the other children from 4-6 years of age.

"Fathers do not devote enough attention to the clitoris and vagina of their daughters. Their caresses too seldom pertain to these regions, while this is the only way the girls can develop a sense of pride in their sex," reads the booklet regarding 1-3 year olds. The authors rationalize, "The child touches all parts of their father's body, sometimes arousing him. The father should do the same."

My source commented:

Of course, I thought, this must be a hoax, similar to the one's I get daily in my email. But just to be sure, I emailed the German Embasy in Ottawa. Here is the response I received:

The brochure you are referring to was only recently made known to the German Minister of Family Affairs, as it was designed under a former

government. The Minister agreed that some wording in the brochure was prone to misunderstandings and needed some reformulation.

The mentioned brochure, which had been accessible online, was promptly taken offline. No print copies had been distributed for some time

already. The Ministry will design a new brochure in the coming months.



Very kind regards,

Christina Lueckerath

Head of Press Section,

German Embassy

We have got to be careful who we trust these days when morality is sinking fast and the "do what you want" socialist message is preached everywhere.